Do trial separations ever work out?
- Is it over when it’s over?
- Is it simply another way of saying it’s over?
- Can they ever work out?
Here are some reactions I have received & my thoughts to them
My husband was playing away from home and I caught him out, I loved him dearly & did not want to let go so I suggested a trail separation to see if I could live without him. Yes I could, the separation only last a couple of weeks before I knew it were finally over.
GT: You were obviously in love with him but he broke your heart – Good for you for giving it a little space to try and work through things – I guess in the end you decided you could no longer trust him.
My girlfriend of 5 years told me one day that she needed space to work out if she wanted to continue the relationship. It came straight out of the blue and was devastated. Very quickly afterwards I heard she was out having fun with her friends and other men. Seems all she wanted was to end the relationship.
GT: It seems from what you’re saying that she wanted to end the relationship but did not have the guts to say it to your face. For goodness sake please don’t take the coward’s way out when you feel it’s over – You need to be honest face to face otherwise it really hurts.
My marriage with my husband hit a rocky patch after 11 years, I suggested a trail separation and it made us realise that we had too much to give up and eventually it saved our marriage.
GT: Glad you did not give up at the first hurdle & managed to sort through your issues – Well done.
So, In Summary…
If you’re using a trail separation to let someone down gently then DONT – Face up to facts & talk it thorough with your partner – everyone deserves to know the reason why something has failed, otherwise you can never move on successfully – on the other hand if you’re having a trail separation to see if it really is over & you do work out your issues then it’s a great way to clear both your heads about what you really want from your relationship.
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